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# Why I Sent It to Friends First
- URL: https://www.authoritativestanding.com/why-i-sent-it-to-friends-first/
- Published: 2026-09-04T19:35:00.000Z
- Updated: 2026-09-17T09:04:28.000Z
- Description: Strangers give you ratings, but friends give you signals. One of those was more useful when the book was not finished yet.
- Author: Tom Voorneveld
- Tags: #x-campaign-1-launch, #linkedin-personal, Authoritative Standing, Character, Tribe

```linkedin
The usual advice is to put your book in front of strangers first, because strangers owe you nothing and will tell you the truth. I did the opposite. Twenty-five early copies went to friends and family.

Why? Because they have watched the journey. The saw me rewriting the book several times, and they have watched me change my mind. They have heard me argue a position at a dinner table and quietly drop it six months later.

That context cuts both ways. It makes their objections worth a great deal more. And their argued praise genuine. One of them wrote to me last week: "I pick up the book when I need to feel confident about my business choices.". That is both a compliment and a signal.

The book is out. Anyone, including strangers can rate it now. The friends already did the harder part.

```

## I could have skipped this step

Plenty of authors go straight to influencers, podcasters, reviewers: the people whose endorsements sell the book. There's a logic to it, as strangers have no incentive to only say what you want to hear.

### I went the other way on purpose

There are 25 people holding early copies. They have seen me change accents in the book and even watched me change my mind. They have heard me argue a position at a dinner table and quietly drop it six months later. These friends and family, have the *context* for what I'm trying to do, and that context cuts both ways.

If a chapter does not land, they will tell me why. If the framework works, they will also tell me why it works for them. One of the best compliments came the other day, when a friend wrote: “I pick up the book when I need to feel confident about my business choices (…)”.

Friends give signal, and that is what I needed for the best result. The book is out… you can see for yourself if the approach worked.